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Author(s):

Leroy Robert “Satchel” Paige, the iconic athlete-philosopher who was probably the greatest baseball pitcher of all time, used to pass around this insightful list of “Rules for Staying Young”:

1. “Avoid fried meats which angry up the blood.”
2. “If your stomach disputes you, lie down and pacify it with cool thoughts.”
3. “Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move.”
4. “Go very light on the vices, such as carrying on in society – the social ramble ain’t restful.”
5. “Avoid running at all times.”
6. “And don’t look back – something might be gaining on you.”
After such a list, the last rule is always where the thoughts reside. In this case, Rule 6 seems vaguely like a line from an old movie or a vaudeville routine, with the playful and significant substitution of the term “something” instead of “someone.” (Could it be a monster? A train locomotive? A robot? A pack of wolves? Or some manner of human?)